


And Then They Kiss, I Guess

by Rikku



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, F/M, Flushed Romance | Matesprits, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-08
Updated: 2012-10-08
Packaged: 2017-11-15 21:49:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/532138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rikku/pseuds/Rikku
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He was tugging fretfully at his sweater, picking it apart with nervously twitching claws. “You’re making an utter mess of your sleeves,” Porrim said sternly, reaching out to tug his hand away from the cuff; Kankri yowled in protest and tried to tug free, but she had rainbow drinker strength and held him easily as she straightened out the loose threads. “There, that’s better.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	And Then They Kiss, I Guess

Kankri had been standing where Meenah left him for nearly an hour. From Porrim’s higher perch, where she was lounging artistically against the banister, she could see him talking energetically to himself, occasionally making spirited hand gestures to illustrate whatever point he’d reached in the speech he was rehearsing. It was adorable – no, it was just sad. Kankri was rather helpless without Porrim to look after him. Not that she _wanted_ to, or anything, not particularly; no public-spirited person could see Kankri and not want to either cuddle him or punch him in the face to shut him up. He was a quadrant magnet, polarising people to pale or caliginous without even trying. Rather impressive, really.

Porrim descended down the stairs to him. “Kankri,” she said, “I’m not sure that wall can understand the finer points of hemocaste politics, though I’m sure it’s very commendable of you to try.” 

Kankri stopped rehearsing to stare at her seriously with blank white eyes. “Actually – and I don’t mean to be offensive correcting you here, but I have to – it’s very important to spend some time putting your thoughts in order in a sensible and logical manner before you monolo – I mean speak to people, so you don’t accidentally phrase something in a potentially triggering or problematic manner,” he said, with dignity so enormous it almost made you forget he was a massive twit. “I’m sure Karkat benefitted from me having taken time to plan out my points beforehand.”

Porrim was in rather a testy mood, so she said, “You were boring him senseless.”

She regretted it immediately. Kankri shrunk back, biting his lip. (It bled red, bright-cherry red. Porrim eyed this with interest.) “I ...” he said, and he looked down. “No I wasn’t,” he muttered, his brow furrowed. “Karkat was, he was interested, he was paying attention, he’s going to be an excellent pupil and I’ll teach him everything I know and, and he’ll like me—”

He was tugging fretfully at his sweater, picking it apart with nervously twitching claws. “You’re making an utter mess of your sleeves,” Porrim said sternly, reaching out to tug his hand away from the cuff; Kankri yowled in protest and tried to tug free, but she had rainbow drinker strength and held him easily as she straightened out the loose threads. “There, that’s better.”

Kankri went limp and sullen in her grasp. “I can’t believe you’re using your strength to oppress others,” he said. “I expected better of you.”

Porrim attempted, diligently, to roll her eyes.

Meanwhile Latula sped her way cheerfully across the dream-cobbles, heading for that set of stairs Porrim had made. (Who had memories of _stairs_ , wow boring!) Once she was up there she paused to pose triumphantly, grinning down at Kankri and Porrim conversing. The two of them looked utterly occupied in each other. A picture of awkward pale bliss.

This was going to be so rad!

Latula kicked her board to the stair rail and leaped nimbly onto it, grinding easily down the railing; at the end of it she did a sweeeeet flip, landing neatly on her hands and cartwheeling upright in time to snag her board out of midair as it fell.

So. Rad.

She cast an expectant grin over at Porrim and Kankri, and her heart fell. Neither of them had even _noticed_.

“Hey guys!” she called cheerfully, waving. “Wasn’t that totally sweet?”

They looked over at least, but neither seemed terribly pleased by her intervention even though it was totally sweet. “It’s not very socially conscious to interrupt when other people are talking!” Kankri said. “Even if you are interrupting by being magnificent and startlingly athletic.” He flushed. “I say this platonically, of course. In. A platonic fashion.”

Latula caught Porrim looking wryly amused by him, and smirked at her in return. _Pale!!_ she mouthed, and Porrim looked displeased and took a careful step away from Kankri, distancing herself from him. Latula grinned.

“Really, though,” Porrim said. “Not that your company isn’t welcome, but we _were_ talking.”

Latula drooped. “Oh,” she said. “Well. That’s fine!” She drew herself up, with dignity, tucking her board under her arm. “If neither of you are in the mood to be awesome, I’ll go hang out with someone who’s actually rad! L8er, losers.”

Porrim raised an eyebrow, looking irritatingly unimpressed. “I think Meenah’s being a bad influence on you,” she said. 

“Latula’s far too strong a person to be influenced by anything Peixes does or says!” Kankri said, smiling adoringly, and Latula shifted uncomfortably. He was speaking platonically, of course. Totally completely platonic in every way. He was celibate and stuff yes.

Porrim was eyeing her thoughtfully, and surprised Latula by saying, graciously, “I’m afraid I missed your rad trick,” she said. “You could demonstrate it again, if you like, we’ll pay attention this time.”  
Latula squeed and flung an arm around each of them. “You are the best!” she trilled. “You are totally completely the best and ...” She trailed off. Porrim had shifted away from her, which wasn’t normal, Porrim was really nice. “Hey, are you okay?”

Porrim cleared her throat elegantly. “I’m hungry,” she said.

There was a pause.

“No need to look so disconcerted,” Porrim said after the moment had stretched out awkwardly, looking more amused than anything else. Kankri flushed and immediately started babbling something about how he’d never ever stereotype people simply by being dead or undead or, or one of the dead undead and how of course he wasn’t disconcerted even slightly no why would you even say that.

Latula waited until he was finished, then suggested, bouncing on her heels, “Feed on Kankri!”

Porrim raised an eyebrow. “Why would you suggest that?”

“Oh, come on, you practically wear matching Moirail Outfits,” Latula said, impatiently, “you can’t seriously not trust—”

Porrim laughed and shook her head. “That’s not what I meant,” she said. “Kankri’s blood is far from savoury. Rather sickly-sweet for me, I’m afraid.”

Latula said, “Oh! I thought it’d taste – well, I mean, not that I’d know ...” She trailed off.

There was another of those pauses.

Then Porrim slipped an arm around her waist and smouldered. “If you like,” she suggested, eyes lidded, “I could drink his blood while you’re here, and do my best to describe it; then yours, perhaps, so there can be some basis for comparison.” She added, delicately, “I mean we may as well occupy ourselves in _some_ way ...”

Latula wrapped her mind around this for a second, then grinned, a grin with lots of teeth. She wasn’t the kind of gal to back down from a challenge. “I _would_ like!”

Porrim pulled each of them closer. “Excellent,” she purred.

Kankri looked panicky as he started to comprehend what was going on, and Latula and Porrim smirked at each other over his head. They’d all known each other for sweeps and for eternities, and by this point, words were mainly just a courtesy.

Kankri, being Kankri, persisted in using them anyway. Way, way too much. All. The. Time. “Ha, that’s,” he said, “uh, not meaning to, to _shame_ you for being a sexually promiscuous complete whore, but that’s, really that’s not a tenable proposition at this moment in, um, in--”

Latula, cheerfully, patted his ass, and Kankri squeaked and shut up immediately. Useful thing to know, that.


End file.
